But, I am hopeful that you are enjoying all it.
On the weekend - which if you followed any of my Twitter updates - I was partly in recovery mode from a little too much indulgence in tequila-mixed margaritas. And while cozily camped out in my comfy not-so-sexy pajamas in the corner of my couch, I had the chance to read a few things from those trashy women's magazines that I love (and hate) so much.
As a woman, it's important to be seen (by those who matter in an intimate sense) as desirable. We want to feel loved, needed - and lusted over. It's a big part of how we define our sexual side. And on the good side for you guys, when we feel all those emotions from you, the rewards tend to be significant and valuable for our relationship together.
I've worked relatively hard at being more open-minded in my personal life, and actually expressing the sexual fantasies that go on inside of me. Some are relatively tame in comparison, while others have become huge bucket list items in my life regardless of how complicated it may be to turn them into reality. So when I read this bit about the top five fantasies women have, I thought it might be a good thing to share.
Here 5 common female sexual fantasies from the Good In Bed blog, and a look at where they come from:
- Sex with a stranger. In a 2001 study published by The Journal of Sex Research, 80 percent of partnered women said they had fantasized about someone other than their partner during sex in the previous two months. Why? Because, while sex within the context of monogamy can be totally hot, it's hard to replicate the intensity of the initial chase. Fantasizing about someone new is a way of recalling how fantastic it felt to be so obviously pursued.
- Being dominant in bed. While it may seem counter-intuitive for a woman to want to take charge when what they're really craving is the feeling of being desired, the dominatrix scenario actually revolves around the man worshipping the woman's body, and begging her for attention.
- Exhibitionism. In this scenario, a woman not only gets to enjoy sex with her partner, but also gets to enjoy the knowledge that someone else (or several someones?) is feeling aroused by watching her in action.
- Being sexually ravaged. Sometimes known as rape fantasy, this particular desire is not necessarily what you think. How many spicy hot movie scenes have you enjoyed in which the man pushed the woman up against the wall, forcing a kiss upon her? The thought of a man so bursting with desire is an undeniably a turn on for some women.
- Enjoying a threesome. Being worshipped and adored by two different men - or a man and a woman - can be twice as nice.
"Too many of us feel guilty about our fantasy life, whether because we dream about someone other than our current partner or because our imagination runs wild with behavior we would never condone in real life.
"The truth is, a healthy fantasy life is one key to a great sex life - and your partner might not always play the leading role. Fantasy isn't the sad daydreaming of the lonely, forlorn or frustrated in love. Research shows that people with active fantasy lives are more sexually satisfied, more sexually responsive and more adventurous about sex in general. Not bad."