March 5, 2011

Swinging | Losing My Lifestyle Virginity

One of my online friends asked me this the other night. I think I’ve probably answered it a few times before, but I've never sat down to put it all out there for you guys.

My husband and I first got into the idea of exploring a little something outside of our “traditional” relationship shortly after we launched my website. In the whole idea of creating this new hobby, we had signed up for Messenger, MSN, chatrooms - all kinds of places that we might use to raise awareness that we were now doing photos online. At first it was a bit daunting, but after a couple months I had gotten caught up quite a bit with online chatting, and webcamming … exploring was a bit of a new thing for me and I liked how I felt.

Through that more than a few conversations emerged about my thoughts and fantasies of another person joining us in the bedroom. I wasn’t completely ready to admit to my husband at the time that I was more than willing to venture into that experience for real, although my imagination would run wild at the thought.

I would have conversations with some of my online friends around that idea, sometimes taking it to some very interesting places – yes guys, as in cybersex. To be honest, it was an exciting and dark time for me. I was having a great deal of fun online, but didn’t really pay attention to how it was affecting my relationship at home. I was putting more effort into getting online than I was getting some for real, and started to keep a few too many "secrets" about what I was up to when my hubby wasn't home. But after some time, we worked through a lot of the difficulties and arguments – only to realize that we had grown a lot stronger and closer as a couple, and still shared in a lot of those fantasies.

It led us to the point of sharing the fun and excitement as a couple, through which we discovered a couple of lifestyle websites (swingers) … and then one time my husband came home from the adult store with a brochure for a lifestyle club not far from where we live. We tried the club a few times and really got into how it made us feel, the sexuality, the adventure …

The next step seemed kind of logical. We could either try to meet another couple at one of the clubs, or we could try a website designed for dating as couples… we did the website. Eventually we met and chatted with a couple online that kind fit our interests and level of experience. They, too, were just exploring and “dipping their toes” into the whole scene.

We met a few times with these new friends, slowly discovering a bit more territory, but never quite going anywhere. My husband and I reached the moment when we had to simply say that they were great people, fun to hang with, but just didn’t have that sexual chemistry that was going to take away our virginity in the swinging scene.

In the meantime, I had a few of my own experiences discovering more about my bi-curiosity with another woman; which only served as fuel for my fire to take things further.

It took a little over a year before that really came about…and in a bit of an unexpected way. We were at a neighbour’s house with a bunch of friends one night when I got into a pretty deep conversation with one of the guys there. We were stood alone in the kitchen for over an hour just talking, with the level of sex in the conversion edging higher and higher. I don’t know if it was that sexually charged innuendo, or the drinks, but I ended up telling him about my website. We chatted about it for a while about it…then when he said he and his wife were going out to the garage for a cigarette, I tagged along and the conversation continued with her there.

We stood out there for probably another hour. The time never really occurred to me, as I was enjoying this new found liberation of finally being able to talk to someone about my site other than my husband and sister. We were talking about things like the outfits, my tattoo and nipple ring - how those came about, etc. - when in a very humourous, movie-style moment, just as I was showing them my nipple ring, my husband opened the door … lots of explaining to him after the fact.

Later that night, when we were at home (around 2:00 a.m.), me horny as a rabbit from what happened earlier and getting busy in bed, the phone rang. It was our friend asking what the website URL was so he and his wife could "just have a quick look" at what I had been telling them. I talked with him for a little bit while my hubby was going down on me. The guy must have sensed something was not entirely "right" with the conversation and apologized for calling so late. I told him everything was alright and then explained to him exactly what was going on at that very moment. I described in pretty good detail how it was working for me, and whatnot. It was the first time I think I ever had phone sex in a literal sense!

It was an exceptionally erotic moment; which also took our adventure to a new level.

A few weeks later, the four of us got together for the first time and pushed the limits a bit more. Then the next time we got together, after a bit of hot tub fun, we went into the bedroom and carried on a bit more. That night was the first time is almost 20 years that another man had touched me in all those delicious places. And the first time I woman had ever brought me to orgasm.

My sex life had now entered a whole new stage.

Andee     xoxo

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