Aural Sex | Loving The Dirty Talk

One of the subjects that came up recently in conversation was how much of a fine line it can be between flirtation and, for lack of a better word at the moment, solicitation. I don’t mean the actual proposal of sex for money, but I mean how certain words take a hot moment in a much different direction. It can be erotic in the right place, but it can also be exceptionally creepy if they come a bit too early.

When the timing is right, there is nothing like the thrill of sexual innuendo and putting that knowing smile on the face of someone else as they interpret what you have just said in the many different ways it can be taken. It's the fine art of flirting and leaving the other person with enough ... hmm ... confusion in mind as to whether you meant one thing, or they are interpreting it wrong.

On the flip side, sexually aggressive statements of a graphic nature may not rank as a great ice-breaker, because they don't really engage the imagination.

I like to surprise my husband ever now and then. It helps keep him on his toes, and keeps the mind going at top speed and well-lubricated. And trust me guys, lubrication is not a bad thing … not even close to being a bad thing, so get over it and get it for your bedroom.

So, over the past few months, I have been pushing my vocabulary harder, turning up the heat on my libido, and tempting fate by overcoming my fear of flirtation and sexual interest. In past, there are a lot of instances that I would have been more inclined to hide from him; more so to avoid unnecessary questions.

I have always been a bit flirty. I tended to have more guy friends than girls when I was younger. That may have been because I was more of an athlete than a cheerleader type. And I’m a “touch the arm” kind of person, a “lean in close and I know you can see down my top but let me whisper this anyway” kind of girl. But I have not been the type to intentionally move closer to the edge.

When the heat turns back on me, I tend to run and hide - which is why the whole website experience and blogging has been good for me.

And a bit naïve...
My husband still teases me about something that happened a few years back. I was working at a local fitness club as a receptionist and would often chat with the members. I always considered myself to be friendly more than flirty. Until one day when a guy that I chatted with often asked me if I might be interested in going for lunch some time. I was married, he was married … I figured it was a “friend” thing, not a guy trying to pick me up.

Yeah, OK … I admit that I was a bit naïve.

It was all in the words …

Lately, I have been more focused on how I communicate with the men around me, and have been watching carefully the reaction that it can have. And I admit, I love it. There is something very rewarding in playing the game and overcoming the fear of where it may lead.

Call it “aural sex.”

But at the same time, I have been left with wondering if there are a lot of guys that don’t understand how to play along with that game and recognize that some statements, or words, put a damper on the moment.

When flirting with a woman, is the key to get her into bed ASAP, or build the sexual tension and create an intriguing relationship/friendship?

I’m intrigued … and confused.

However, I’m equally intrigued by how, once the guy gets us into bed, we can turn those words against him and leave him speechless. I don’t mean that in a mean or hurtful sense. But it is something I am enjoying lately as my own sexual adventure is drawing out a lot more dirty talk AFTER the flirting has taken place.

You know, the point where the innuendo is replaced with the graphic descriptions ...

There is one word that I know an awful lot of women hate hearing. In fact, I’ve been told it is about the worst word you can use around a woman. And in about 99 per cent of the cases, I would agree because more often than not I hear it being used to describe her personality as opposed to a body part. Personally, I would be offended if a guy used it the describe me.

But, when used in a more sexually appropriate situation, I was surprised at how excited it made me feel. When my mind was lost in swirls of incredibly erotic and dirty fantasies … well … it made “that word” quiver when he used “that word” in a way that put my mind into a whole new sexual high.

I have also learned that I love using the word in the heat of the moment, when I can sense his ever-increasing desire, as a way to push his own imagination to the point of no return. I think his reaction is more from the point of how unusual it is to hear a woman say it out loud than it is about the graphic name for a body part.

I think you know where I’m going with it.

Anyway, it’s August … otherwise known as those dog days of summer. And a damn good time to practice a few new ways to flirt, a few new words to score with and a few new words to make me talk dirty.

Andee     xoxo