TMI Tuesday | The Long & Short of It

When I first noticed the subject line for this week's TMI Tuesday, my mind immediately went to thoughts of trying to remember all the penises I have seen ... believing that once again we were going to be talking about whether or not size matters, the biggest, the smallest. You get the idea. 

Thank you Erotic Adventures in Brisneyland for the following TMI Tuesday questions.

1. What is the longest relationship you have been in?

Pretty easy answer for me – my marriage. I have been with my husband since I was 16, engaged at 18, and still having an absolute blast more than 20 years after we first fell in love.

2. What is the shortest relationship you have been in?

A tougher question to answer, but probably one of those Grade 6 schoolyard romances where dating meant you talked to each other, maybe held hands. I’m sure he cheated on me by talking to another girl – or maybe I cheated on him by walking out to recess with another boy ...

3. How often do you have sex? How often do you want sex?

I would like to be able to provide a statistical answer, but the truth is there just isn’t one. Like so many other couples, our sex life has highs and lows of frequency. Most of the lows are just the reality of being two very busy people with two very busy children and two very busy careers. In fact, it was out of a lot of that swirling insanity that my website was born. We needed to find something to bring us back to being a very sexual couple – a spark, a flame, a burning passion – and it served that excitement quite well. Since that time, it has blossomed into an important part of my sexual adventure and discovering a lot of new things about the sexual side of me.

And there are highs, when our lives bring us closer together and we’ll go for weeks where things are raging like teenagers discovering sex for the first time. And as much as I love those periods, I think we both know that those moments can’t last forever ... and even if we kid ourselves into thinking it would great if they could, we all know that it would become routine. Our sex life needs to be varied in order for it to be rewarding.

We have reached the stage in our relationship where sex also varies. There is the “let’s fuck just cause we need to” moments; where it’s raw, dirty, hard and fast. There are the romantic moments when we need to feel that connection as a couple deeply in love. And then there are the “fantasy fucks,” where we’re horny, creative and not so much in a hurry to get it over with.

4. How long does sex usually last?

It usually lasts from the time it starts, and goes until it’s over.

Not exactly what you were looking for? Well, a stopwatch has never really been a part of my sex life – kind of the same reason why a ruler has never been part of my sex life.

Some sex can be incredible when it’s fast, hard and over like that. There’s a huge erotic part of me that loves a well-timed quickie – hike the hem, drop the panties and take me from behind. And then, as I mentioned earlier, there are other times when I want you to start with the mind-fuck early in the day and mess with my imagination for hours. Then, by the time I get home from work, I’m horny and ready for some serious orgasmic delights.

5. Have you ever had an experience where someone couldn’t perform, finished too quickly or couldn’t keep up with you? Tell us about it?

Sadly, yes, there have been a couple occasions when things didn't work out exactly as I would have liked. But rather than dwell on those I would like to say that it's far more important to focus on the positive moments that occur in every sexual encounter. 

But that's not what you want on a TMI Tuesday, is it?

One time that stands out in my mind isn't so much about a partner that couldn't perform, but my libido was racing much faster than his. It was in the early days of our "swinging experiment;" we had finally made the leap to exploring a foursome with another couple. Things were moving along at a very delightful level, and lots of kissing, fondling and oral sex had taken place. But when I was looking to keep everything headed towards an orgasmic conclusion, I found my partner had been tapped out from all the other adventurous interludes of the night.

6. If you could only have one “type” of sexual encounter for the rest of your life, would you prefer:

     a) short and sweet

     b) wham bam thank you ma’am

     c) here for the long haul

     d) slow and tender

Tough choices to be honest ... but pressed to answer, I would have to go with my inner romantic and pick “d) slow and tender.” 

Bonus: Would you consider ending an otherwise healthy and loving relationship if the sex wasn’t what you wanted? 

Hmm ... another toughie this week. I would have to say no, because I think I would put in as much effort as I could to bring it to a point where it was what I wanted. I think otherwise it would depend a lot on the reasons why the sex was not what I wanted.

I am very sexual person – if you hadn’t noticed – and physical intimacy plays an important role in my life. But fortunately, technology has also given women the gift of some incredible mind-blowing, sex-enhancing aids.

Andee     xoxo