May 22, 2012

TMI Tuesday | The Inverted Poll

Good morning everyone...I'm recovering from our first long weekend of the summer here; well, the unofficial start of summer anyway. But what summer means around here is getting together with good friends, sharing a few drinks and backyard campfires - and the occasional heated debate over something relatively irrelevant.

When I noticed that this week's TMI Tuesday was focusing on the idea of opinions and polls, I figured I would chime in with some of my own thoughts.

In many polls, you are asked if you strongly agree, somewhat agree, neither agree nor disagree, somewhat disagree or strongly disagree with some proposition. Today, we go the other way. We supply the answer, you supply the question.

1. Tell us something with which you strongly agree, or greatly like.
Communication is the key to a successful marriage. I have used this as the underline in almost everything I have shared on here about how my sexual adventure got off the ground, and developed into some of the most incredible and erotic experiences I could ever imagine. Because I have been able to communicate openly with my partner, I've had a number of great fantasies become realities and discovered that there is some much of what I want that I can have without it having to be a secret. Playing together is so much more fun that the fear of playing and getting caught.

2. Tell us something with which you somewhat agree, or somewhat like.
Flirting with other people can be a healthy element to a relationship. Far too many experts suggest that flirting is a dangerous habit, especially when you are involved in a committed relationship, but what I think is completely opposite. What is more dangerous is the habit of keeping secrets.

3. Tell us something to which you are indifferent, or have no opinion.
Tofu ... although by making a comment, I suppose that would suggest I have an actual opinion on it.

4. Tell us something with which you somewhat dislike or disagree with.
Although I don't live in the United States, I disagree with the growing religious influence in politics. I understand why some Americans find it important to keep a connection between the two - especially with the modern fear of the Islamification of western society - but I also fear that people overlook the fact that there are radicals in all religions, including Christianity. And while these fears are generally about civil rights and preserving a way of life, eventually the influence will grow to clamp down on our sexual rights.

5. Tell us something with which you strongly disagree, or greatly dislike.
That homosexuality is a choice. It's not that I am a particular advocate for homosexuality - in fact, I find it particularly offensive when my city is overtaken for the annual Pride Day celebrations because I think events like this are more about overt activism and politicizing the issue versus advancing people's understanding of other people's lifestyles. That said, when I have to endure conversations with the narrow minded who suggest that people intentionally choose to be gay, I have to roll my eyes and look for someone I can debate the benefit of tofu with.

Bonus: What is an opinion held by others that makes you angry?
That women need a "man" in their lives. As in the comment: "Do you need a man to help you with that?" No, what I need a big ol' crochet hook to shove up his ass to fish out that chauvinist pig attitude.

I have a partner, who happens to be a male, but by no means is he a stereotypical "man." Because he breaks the mold and does not behave like the stereotype society suggests he should, he is a very happy and sexually rewarded husband. The idea that women are the weaker sex and can't do certain things for themselves makes me cringe. And people who continually cling to the idea that we "need a man" just piss me off.
Andee     xoxo


H said...

I love your bonus question answer, shove a big ol'crochet hook up his ass to fish out that attitude... love it... may I suggest starting with a butt plug and see if that works first :)

Jack and Jill said...

Communication is huge. We see so many couples - not just married couples, though some are - run into problems because one or more partner refuses to communicate openly, or perhaps doesn't know how. A good marriage is strong, but not strong enough for secret-keeping.

Flirting with people who aren't your partner is incredibly fun, and potentially very revitalizing to a relationship. Some people will disbelieve me for saying that, or even judge me for it. But people like that will never understand. I suppose that flirting CAN be dangerous, but only if done behind the back of one's partner, or with the intention of taking things further than agreed upon by those in the actual relationship, i.e. the one flirting and his/her partner.

Great answer to #4. Very well-said. The likely eventual clamping down, as you put it, on our sexual freedoms, is a big fear of ours. It's something that influences the way we vote. We are determined to live our lives without having to subjugate our sexual expression to the whim of some out-of-touch politician who's desperately pandering for votes.

We've never felt that homosexuality is a choice. Who would choose to subject themselves to derision, bigotry, and even violence based on their sexual orientation? That being said, I don't care one way or the other whether it's a choice or not. If it WERE a choice, does that somehow give narrow minded people the right to discriminate against them? I ask because, as someone who consciously chooses to engage in sexual practices that some might find distasteful or deviant but which do not involve a member of the same sex, I don't want someone judging me and trying to prohibit me from doing so just because it's something I choose.

We don't hear "Do you need a man to help you with that?" I'm not trying to insinuate that my locale is more progressive or enlightened than yours, but I don't imagine that such an attitude would be appreciated where we live. Your
"crochet hook" comment was priceless.

Andee said...

@H - LOL...I work with a woman who is very much of that ilk, a touch on the trailer-trash side mixed with some old fashioned ideas on feminism. Its more fun to shock the shit out of her than argue over the reasons why "I don't need a man to help me with that."

@Jack & Jill - Talks lots and don't keep secrets: two big keys to a successful relationship in my book.

Personally, I do have a fear that more and more puritan ideologies are taking over our lawmakers, even here in Canada too. There was a time when it was understand that "church and state" were separate. Now the lines are very definitely blurred. I find that scary because we live in a culture that says Islam tends to be radical and extreme - and turn a blind eye to the equally-extreme views being bandied about by our "Christian" politicians.