Help Wanted, Must Like Brass

There’s a bit of a pole-dance controversy going on in Ontario these days, thanks in part to our government putting an end to work visas for exotic dancers and a club located in Windsor that has offered a college tuition incentive.

I’m generally not one to get too caught up in the world of politics. I don’t find politics very interesting, nor do I believe in anything that any one of them tells me. Frankly, I prefer to focus on the positive aspect of what goes on around me and leave the arguments for those who are interesting in having a stroke instead of getting one.

But this is one little political tornado that I found kind of intriguing, amusing … and, well, got me thinking I might like to do some investigation. Not to mention, with students returning to school this week, the debate going on is really entertaining. You'll see what I mean in a few paragraphs.

In Canada, back in the 1990s, our government allowed a program that gave work visas to women who wanted to come here and work as strippers. Regardless of where you might sit on the whole philosophy of strip clubs and adult entertainment, it was at least a program that relied on secured work – as opposed to the far-too-many free handouts we already have in place.

Our current government has decided to end the program, meaning strip clubs will no longer be able to hire foreign dancers. Apparently this is a huge business, and as such, lots of clubs are left with the prospect of not having anyone to gyrate around the brass pole anymore. In response, the association that represents exotic dancers in Canada immediately took to the media with some scare tactics, saying clubs would now have to rely on recruiting good ol’ Canadian girls from places like, clubs, universities and colleges – and, Dads get your legally registered long rifles out – high schools.

The idea is to create a high level of fear that all the little darlings will flock to centre stage and change their dull suburban monikers to something more sensual like Candi, Brandi or Destiny. Never mind that the legal age in Ontario is 19; meaning at best, a girl could hit the stilettos at 18 ... still a year post Catholic schoolgirl minikilt. Anyone dancing at 17 without fake ID would definitely bring some serious trouble to any establishment.

Naturally, the move was aimed at capitalizing on the current state of fear that exists over the stripper shortage and schoolgirl seduction as opposed to desperate business practices.

The Leopard Lounge, in marketing brilliance, has countered that instead of relying on European dancers anymore or hitting up Mrs. Johnson's Grade 12 math class, they will offer a $1,700 tuition incentive and $500 bonus to any Canadian college or university student that will dance at the club – as long as they maintain a B+ average, and probably a B+ bra size.

Personally, I think it's brilliant - although a touch on the cheap side. Shortly after this hit the headlines, another story started to attract attention, revealing that the average Canadian university student will graduate $24,000 in debt. The stripper scholarship may get good grades for the attention-achievement assignment, but will barely buy the text books for the course.

Andee     xoxo